


Dr. Shiny and the Case of the Beautiful Man

by ShatteredPrism



Series: At the Heart of these Arrhythmic Palpitations [1]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: 'dog'ter au, Doctors AU, Fluff, M/M, because he had to hear victor complaining and decided that Enough is Enough, or should i say, they're both doctors au, victor is a pediatrician, yuri is the guy who gets them together, yuuri is a veterinarian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-15
Updated: 2018-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-18 15:48:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13684797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShatteredPrism/pseuds/ShatteredPrism
Summary: There are about five things that Victor, in this very moment, is absolutely sure of.1. The spawns of satan are here2. they are not accompanied by their angel of a mother3. they are with the most beautiful man he's ever seen4. his scrubs are wet from where he'd dropped water on himself5. and Victor is very, very gay.Emphasis on point five, with a side of cupid's arrow and "ba-dum ba-dum" on a plate.Because he is Very Gay, and not only is he Very Gay but he is also Hopelessly Attracted to a man who is undoubtedly Very Straight and very Unavailable and is perhaps the Most Beautiful Man Victor has ever seen.---in which Victor is a doctor, Yuuri is a godfather, and Yuri just wants some peace and quiet and a larger stash of lollipops.





	Dr. Shiny and the Case of the Beautiful Man

**Author's Note:**

  * For [slightlied](https://archiveofourown.org/users/slightlied/gifts).



> Happy Galentine's Day, Justine! <333

There are about five things that Victor, in this very moment, is absolutely sure of.

  1. The spawns of satan are here
  2. they are not accompanied by their angel of a mother
  3. they are with the most beautiful man he's ever seen
  4. his scrubs are wet from where he'd dropped water on himself
  5. and Victor is very, very gay.



 

Emphasis on point five, with a side of cupid's arrow and "ba-dum ba-dum" on a plate.

Because he is Very Gay, and not only is he Very Gay but he is also Hopelessly Attracted to a man who is undoubtedly Very Straight and Very Unavailable and is perhaps the Most Beautiful Man Victor has ever seen.

Victor sighs and his mouth twists into a soft moue. It's very unfair, he thinks as he watches said man sit down on the floor with his three adorable, brutally honest girls, that this man exists -- a man who has the softest eyes and an equally gentle smile and hair almost like the down of feathers... so soft it looks that Victor bets it could float just above his palm if he moved his hand the right way...

But that is neither here nor there, because Victor is Very Gay and he must hold back the stars in his eyes and the sun in his teeth and stare at this gorgeous walking impossibility without the air in his lungs.

It's fine. It's totally, completely fine. Nothing big. Nothing serious. As Gloria Gaynor would say, _he will survive._

Mila's at the front already. "Look at how big you've grown!" she coos to the three devilspawns, "Last time I saw you, you all were this big!" And she shows Beautiful Man exactly how big they were with her hands, much to the triplets' delight, and he laughs. If Victor wasn't deceased already then he is now, heart rabbiting in his chest and throat suddenly very, very dry.

Unattainable Man has the softest laugh, god, that should be illegal --

"Let's check your height!" Mila says.

Victor twists away from the doorway with a gasp. Amazingly Beautiful Man had stood and wow, he's so pretty, so unbelievably and incredibly pretty and Victor had the urge to reach out and touch him. Victor wants to hold those slender hips between his hands and kiss his forehead and sway with him in the midnight breeze inside a gazebo by the lake. 

It's this revelation that tilts his head back to stare at the ceiling. He'd been wrong before, Victor realizes, putting a palm over his rapidly beating heart. He wasn't just Very Gay. No he is, in fact, Very Gay^2. Maybe to the third power.

Victor has to actually talk to this man. The thought builds clouds in his knees and Victor swears for a moment that he's floating.

He peeks around the doorway again.

Between his office and the waiting area are four exam rooms -- two on the left, two on the right, small for a clinic but perfect for a private practice like this. Mila's standing by the height chart on the wall, tongue out and poised as she takes one -- Axel? -- of the triplets' measurements. Victor's too far away to hear exactly what they're saying over the girls' laughter but he thinks he hears the soft notes of Beautiful Man's voice float down the hall.

One of the girls notices Victor peeking around the corner like some sort of creep -- honestly he is a Doctor and should know better than this -- and, delighted, cracks a wicked grin and screams, "Hi Dr. Shiny!"

Victor whirls back into the safety of his office before Gorgeous Man can turn to him and fell him with those bespectacled, pretty eyes, just as Yuri cackles out a laugh so loud it rings in his ears.

It's not the first time that's happened. Actually, ever since he opened his own practice, his patients had taken to calling him that horrible, horrible nickname.

He knows they aren't being mean; kids are just honest and have no filter about these things, but that only makes it worse. Why does it make it worse? Because they're telling the truth, and because they're telling the truth, Victor knows his forehead is much worse than he wants to think it is.

Only one thing can make him feel better in these situations. Is it healthy? No. But he'll be damned if he goes into that room with Beautiful Man without one.

So, he waits; he listens with one ear on Mila and waits for the tell-tale sweep of the exam room door to close before he makes his escape to the front where a bowl of lollipops await him.

Yuri cackles when Victor appears from around the corner, surreptitiously brushing his bangs carefully over the wide expanse of his forehead. “Need me to call a buffer to make that forehead shine?”

Victor stares at him before he snatches a pink lollipop from the bowl.

_"Victor!”_ Yuri scowls, bouncing to his feet, "Put it back!" 

“Sorry, I couldn’t hear you over the sound of how much I didn’t ask for your opinion.” Victor pops the lollipop in his mouth and tosses the trash in the small waste basket hidden behind the front desk. “Talk to me about the man.” 

Yuri shoots him a glare sharp enough to cut glass. “Are you serious.” 

“I’m gay, Yuri.” 

“What.”

“So very gay.”

“Oh my god.” 

Victor takes out the lollipop. It is considerably smaller than what it had been a mere minute ago. “Please.” 

Yuri, perhaps wisely, takes the bowl of lollipops away from the counter before Victor can grab another. “Go _away._ ” 

“Help your employer out.”

“Go do your _job_.”

“Part of my job is knowing about the parent involved.” 

“Part of your job is to ask the guy yourself.” 

“That’s more of your job.” 

“My job is to schedule your patients, Victor, _get out of my face--”_

“Do your employer a solid?” 

_“YOU’RE MY COUSIN.”_

“And also your employer.”

Yuri drags his fingertips through his hair and opens his mouth wide, wide, so very wide, probably about to scream “GO AWAY” at Victor, but that’s when Mila opens the door and they both freeze. Mila lets the door click shut and grins this positively shit-eating grin. Victor knows exactly what she’s going to say before she even says it. 

"Don't do it." he warns. 

"Paging Dr. Shiny." she teases.

“Dis _missed_.” Victor near-shrieks. The lollipop is now nothing more than a stick. 

If there’s any time Victor needed reassuring, it was now. 

“Is there any chance he’s single?” Victor asks Yuri, who gives him a look that would make any other man crawl away with a tail between their legs. “Mrs. Nishigori’s estranged husband, maybe?” 

“I’m not going to even give that a response.” Yuri sits back in his office chair, plucking a lollipop from the top of the bowl and putting it in his own mouth. The cartoon puppies above Yuri’s head don’t give an answer either, eternally stuck mid-yip. 

“Yuri, I’m going to die.” 

_“Just go ohmygod.”_

Victor does only after a final, final pout in Yuri’s direction. Yuri pointedly ignores it. 

The triplets had come in last week for a sick visit, all three down with the flu. Now, they are here for a well-child visit, a standard procedure that usually only takes twenty minutes. However, as there are three of them and not one, Victor expects to be in that room for at least thirty minutes, if not forty. Thankfully, it’s a slow day, or else they’d be there even longer. 

“Mila, call funeral services in an hour.” Victor says nonchalantly to his medical assistant, whose grin only grows at the look of acceptance on Victor’s face. “Have them cremate my body. Tell Makkachin her daddy died staring into heaven’s eyes.” 

 

* * *

 

If Yuuri could go back in time, he would tell himself _“you really didn’t know anything”._

Because, really, he didn’t. At all. He knew nothing when the nurse called for the triplets, he knew nothing when Lutz shouted “HI DR. SHINY” down the hall (and when he hissed “Lutz!” at her, but all that got him was a side eye smile in return), and he certainly knew nothing when someone who was _not_ an old man came in to the exam room. 

He’d expected an older man, greying, probably with a bald spot from how often Axel, Lutz and Loop had talked about this so called Dr. Shiny’s forehead, but no, nothing like this. 

No. He knew nothing at all. 

“Doctor Victor Nikiforov.” says the definitely not an old man _,_ holding out a manicured hand for Yuuri to shake, “Pleasure to meet you..” 

“Ah, Yuuri.” Yuuri’s swallows. His face ignites in flames as he takes his hand, hoping beyond hope that this gorgeous, entirely unreal doctor would ignore his sweaty palms. “Yuuri Katsuki.” 

“Yuuri.” Dr. Nikiforov’s tongue rolls around the syllables of his name and Yuuri _shivers._

It takes approximately fifteen seconds for Yuuri to realize that he’s in way over his head, and another twelve seconds to come to the undeniable conclusion that Doctor Victor Nikiforov is completely, inconsiderably Out of His League. 

He’s too pretty, too perfect -- intelligent, handsome, playful, great with kids. He handles the triplets like he would his own child, cooing at them and asking about their day. And that’s _before_ Dr. Nikiforov tells Yuuri that the clinic was his own private practice, and it hits Yuuri that Dr. Nikiforov D.O. was the one who’d made the ultimate decision to plaster cartoon puppies on the walls, who’d decided to name his clinic _Playful Puppy Pediatrics_ with the slogan “Here to help your own sweet pupper stay happy and healthy!”. It was all him. 

Yuuri wants to marry him. He really, really does. 

“I like dogs!” Dr. Victor Incredible Nikiforov explains cheerfully, helpings Lutz onto the exam table. “My own poodle was the inspiration for this place. You could say I’m...” Victor looks at the girls then leans over, hand covering his mouth, and whispers, “a _dog-_ tor.” 

Yuuri gasps, _laughs_. Dr. Nikiforov beams at him.

Kill Yuuri now. Send him sinking into the earth with nothing but his dignity to hold on to. He’s officially crushing on a man who loves poodles and puns. 

So Yuuri asks, “You have a poodle?” 

“I do!” Dr. Victor Too-Good-to-Be-True Nikiforov replies, beautiful and friendly and amazing, “Her name is Makkachin and she’s a good girl.” 

Makkachin, Makkachin… where has he heard that name before? But, _god._ Heat rushes through Yuuri’s skin and he curls his fingers into the loose crease of his jeans. It doesn’t matter where he’d heard that name before if the way Dr. Nikiforov talks about her gets Yuuri’s body thrumming like this. 

A man who talks about his dog like this is automatically a good person.

“Dr. Shiny talks about her all the time.” Lutz says. Dr. Nikiforov slows to a standstill, a shadow passing over his eyes. But, still, he pulls his stethoscope from around his neck (which, Yuuri wants to note, is covered in a spotted puppy cozy) and sets the diaphragm on her chest, “We’ve seen videos.” 

“Please… stop calling me that…” 

“And pictures!” pipes up Loop. She and Axel both had attached themselves to Yuuri’s legs, claiming it made them feel better. This was, however, after they’d shared an entirely suspicious grin earlier and looked pointedly in their doctor’s direction. “He has a whole album.” 

A good girl. He has videos and pictures of his good girl. 

Did Yuuri do something? Did he do something to deserve having to sit through forty-five minutes of listening, staring, _drooling_ over a man so out of his league that he might as well be a deity to Yuuri’s lowly, mortal, pining ass? 

Dr. Nikiforov breathes Lutz through a few exercises then wraps his stethoscope back around his neck. The paper on the exam table crinkles when Lutz shifts her weight and lies on her back. Loop says something about the paper being as crinkled as Lutz’s wrinkled shirt and Lutz replies with something equally insulting, but Yuuri doesn’t hear much of the conversation beyond that because Dr. Nikiforov _laughs._

Yuuri must have done something. There’s no other explanation. Maybe this was punishment for not helping that old lady cross the street last week when he was running late for work. No -- it had to have been because he didn’t give Vicchan that extra treat yesterday; Vicchan had been devastated and Yuuri had never felt worse than he did right then. 

“I don’t hear butterflies in your tummy.” Dr. Nikiforov tells Lutz, making her giggle as he pulls an otoscope from his pocket. He turns on the light and takes a look in her ear, brushing aside her ponytail with a gentle touch of his fingers. He smiles playfully at her. “Have you been hiding them in your ear?” 

Yuuri’s shoulders sag the longer he stares at him. He’s so pretty, him with his short silver hair and the splattering of freckles over his neck. And his eyes… wow. They’re blue, bluer than even the sky, twin pools of white-blue ice frozen and glittering with the sparkle of diamonds, so blue that they don’t even have a name. Yuuri would happily drown in them. 

“--Yuuri?” 

Maybe a better description would be a bright and blue gaseous nebula, Yuuri thinks. His eyes are a collection of gas and stardust, beautiful and dangerous and transcending all rules of logic and reasoning. 

“Yuuri.” 

Yuuri jolts, blinks until he’s staring at not just Dr. Nikiforov but the girls, too. Dr. Nikiforov is smiling at him, those eyes not looking away from his. “Are you all right?” he asks and, leaning forward, teases, “I don’t need to do a check up on you, do I?” 

“N-No.” Yuuri’s dizzy from all the blood rushing to his face. His sneakers squeak against the floor when he shifts his weight. “Um, sorry about that. What was that?” 

“I was wondering if you have a dog, too.” Dr. Nikiforov’s smile grows in a way that makes the heat in Yuuri’s cheeks hotter, that mouth of his curled and pink and too pretty for Yuuri to handle. “The girls said you had a dog and I was wondering what kind you had.” 

“Y-Yes. Yes.” Yuuri throws Axel and Loop a pleading look, begging them to keep their mouths shut _please and thank you very much._ “I have a poodle, too. His name is Vicchan.” 

Dr. Nikiforov gasps -- no, he fully turns his swivel chair to gape delightedly at him, mouth stretching into a heart-shaped smile. “A pupper! Is he a good boy?” 

“He’s the _best_ boy.” Yuuri insists quick, “He earns every treat he gets.” 

Dr. Nikiforov’s stare is penetrating. Yuuri’s sure he’s been pinned to his seat by those eyes, and, honestly? He wouldn’t want to move even if he had been. Perhaps that’s a testament to just how much Dr. Nikiforov affects him. 

Yuuri gulps, “He’s a soft and gentle boy.”

Dr. Nikiforov smiles, the corners of his mouth curling delightedly, though his stare hasn’t lessened in the slightest. There’s a flicker of interest in those eyes that has Yuuri sitting up much straighter in his chair. 

It’s then that Axel climbs into Yuuri’s lap and wraps her arms around his neck. “My head hurts.” she whines, “Make it feel better.” 

“But,” Yuuri, bewildered, touches her forehead with the backs of his fingers, “you bragged that you felt perfectly fine just a few minutes ago.” 

“That was _earlier_.” Axel pouts. Loop, for some reason, grins and crosses her arms over her chest. “I have a headache now.” 

“Okay.” Yuuri replies, voice soft. He takes her in his arms and lets her burrow her face into his neck. Her pigtails tickle Yuuri’s nose and his scrunches his face to try to keep from sneezing. 

“Hmm.” 

Yuuri looks up and catches Dr. Nikiforov’s eyes. They’re softer now but less warm than before; a sort of acceptance that smooths the lines of his face and makes his smile colder. He takes in Axel’s distress with a sympathetic, waning smile. “She may have lingering symptoms from their flu.” He holds out his arms for her. “May I?” 

“Oh,” Yuuri blinks, takes a look at Axel in his arms, and adjusts her to hand her over. “Yes. Yes, of course.” 

Dr. Nikiforov takes his time assessing all three girls, taking their temperatures and asking how they’ve been feeling since the week before. They’re just as rambunctious as they’ve always been though, for some reason, somehow more dramatic than usual, draping themselves over each other on the table. One by one they get looked at, and one by one they paddle back to Yuuri when they’re done, climbing on him and begging for attention. 

It’s all so bizarre. Yuuri knows these girls; they’re never this clingy for attention, especially his. 

Well. Not unless they wanted something. 

Yuuri squints at them, trying hard to discern the satisfied smirks each of them wear. Maybe they wanted gelato from Whole Foods, or a blizzard from Dairy Queen, _oh_ or those strawberry gummies from Central Market? That was it, that _had_ to be it; Yuuri was the only one who indulged them in those and they pulled these kind of stunts all the time to butter him up. Taking them to the doctor was no different. 

By the time they’re done, Dr. Nikiforov’s eyes are pinned wholly on Yuuri and he’s _squirming_ , even with the triplets in his lap and his arms. He’s not sure if his heart should be in his throat or not. Maybe it lives there now. 

“They should get over the last bit of the symptoms in a few days,” Dr. Nikiforov says, smiling at them. And maybe, Yuuri thinks, perhaps selfishly, at me.

“Keep giving them fluids to drink and let them finish up the last bit of their medicine.” Dr. Nikiforov’s smile widens then, pointed right at him, and Yuuri’s heart jumps into his right mouth, threatening to fall out with a whole waterfall of words Yuuri knows he’d regret saying. 

Yuuri nods, holding a drowsy Loop closer to his chest. The girls keep him centered in the present and not on the way those eyes light up when Yuuri rolls his lips together. “Okay.” Yuuri nudges Axel to stand so he can, too. “I’ll pass on the information to their mother. Thank you, Dr. Nikiforov.” 

“It’s my pleasure.” Dr. Nikiforov’s smile grows. “Truly. Shall I walk you out?” 

“Oh, uh.” 

_“Say yes.”_ Yuuri jerks when Loop’s voice whispers in his ear, very much awake. “Do it.” 

“Um. Yes.” Yuuri can feel Loop’s smile burn into his shoulder with two pairs of eyes burning smug holes into the side of his face. “Yes, that. That would be great.” 

They go out together, Dr. Nikiforov holding the door open while Yuuri walks by, murmuring a shy _thank you_ that he hopes the doctor doesn’t notice, cause, god. He’s so obvious, he _has_ to be, right? From the blushing to the stammering to the _ums_ and _uhs_ and the constant, monosyllable _yes_ he keeps doing, he has to be obvious and Dr. Nikiforov has to be kindly ignoring the signs of his attraction. 

Even rejecting him, Dr. Nikiforov is so kind. 

Axel tugs on Dr. Nikiforov’s lab coat and points at a toy treasure box in the waiting area, bouncing on her toes. “Can we get something from the treasure box, Dr. Shiny?” 

Dr. Nikiforov’s smile tightens. “Of course. Remember -- one toy each.” 

“Did I hear treasure box?” Loop gasps upright and claps her hand against Yuuri’s chest. “Yuuri, Yuuri, put me down, _Yuuri._ ” 

Yuuri can only oblige. He sets her down on her feet and the three of them scurry off for the treasure box, throwing another “thanks, Dr. Shiny!” over their shoulder that Yuuri can’t help but snort at. He hides his mouth behind his fingers when Dr. Nikiforov looks at him and pretends to cough, looking anywhere but at him. 

The boy at the front desk rolls his eyes when they approach. “You’re hopeless.” he says to Dr. Nikiforov point blank, tired and so very done. 

“Yuuri,” Dr. Nikiforov’s smile thins, “this is my receptionist, Yuri. He’ll be taking care of you before you go.” 

Yuuri eyes the blond teenager with a hint of apprehension, curling his fingers in the hem of his shirt over and over again. Yuri stares back at him, almost daring him to say something, _anything_ , about where they’d met before. _Keep your mouth shut,_ Yuri seems to say, rolling his eyes from him to Dr. Nikiforov and back to him again. 

Lutz picks that moment to peek over the counter and point at a bowl of lollipops that could use a refilling. Axel and Loop pop up right behind her, peeking over the counter in a group of brown eyes and ponytails. “Can we have some?” 

Yuri slides his sharp eyes from her to the bowl and back again. He sighs, rolls his eyes, and brings the bowl down so the girls can take their fill. 

“Cash or card?” Yuri asks, voice dull, bored, as the girls take two lollipops each and run back to the treasure box. He sets the bowl back on the counter and looks at Yuuri in exasperation. “Payment.”

“Ah.” Yuuri shifts his own weight and sifts around his pockets for his wallet. “Card.” He pulls out Yuuko’s grey credit card and hands it to Yuri, who swipes it from his hand. 

“Yuuri.” Dr. Nikiforov props his elbow up on the higher level of the counter, leaning his weight against it. Yuuri swallows, feels the heat creep back into his cheeks when he takes in how close Dr. Nikiforov is. 

_Stop it,_ Yuuri wants to say. _Stop being so attractive._

“Would you like us to schedule the next appointment for your girls?” Dr Nikiforov smiles at him, completely unaware that Yuuri’s brain has ground to a startling halt. _Your girls. Yourgirlsyourgirlsyourgirls. Oh. Ohmygod ohmygod oh._ “We can get you all set up --” 

“They’re not,” Yuuri gasps, flustered and embarrassed and wide eyed, “They’re, they’re not my girls. Ah.” Yuuri ducks his eyes and stares at his shoes, not even able to look Dr. Nikiforov in the eye after this blinding and horrible misunderstanding, “I mean, well, they _are_ mine, kind of. In a way. Not mine, but also mine. I mean! They’re my godchildren. I’m the godfather. Their, their mom, Yuuko, couldn’t make it today so I’m here instead.” 

Oh god, Dr. Nikiforov had thought Yuuri was their father the _entire time_ . God, oh god, Yuuri had been making goo goo eyes at him and he’d thought Yuuri was _married_. No wonder Dr. Nikiforov had looked so...so… Yuuri’s knees wobble and he has to grip the counter to keep himself steady. 

He can never come back here again, nope, nuh- _uh._

Dr. Nikiforov blinks once, twice. His mouth forms an _oh_ of understanding, mouth puckered, but then that _oh_ becomes an _ah_ and that heart-shaped smile from earlier returns full-force, aimed entirely at Yuuri. 

“So…” Dr. Nikiforov starts slowly, smile growing, “not the father.” 

“N-No.” Yuuri’s already long-gone dignity shrivels like a raisin. 

“My apologies,” Dr. Nikiforov didn’t sound sorry at all, “I’ll give Mrs. Nishigori a call then and we can schedule the girls’ next appointment.”

“O-Okay.” was Yuuri’s weak reply. 

Yuri gags loud enough to break Yuuri out of his trance and slides Yuuko’s card across the counter. “Here’s your card. Sign this.” He slams a receipt and a pen right beside the card. Yuuri, thankful for the distraction, takes the pen and quickly signs his name on the receipt, makes sure to dot his i’s and cross his t’s. He pockets the card back into his wallet. 

Dr. Nikiforov coughs into his shoulder and rubs his fingers over his lab coat. “Yuuri,” he starts, pausing when Yuuri makes himself look at him again. 

“Yes?” 

“Well. I..” He pauses again, cheeks swelling with a soft pink. 

_Oh no._ Yuuri realizes in horror. _The girls got him sick. He thought I was interested in him even as a married man and now they got him_ sick. 

Oh no. Oh no nononononono -- 

“Well. Since that’s… Since that’s the case,” Dr. Nikiforov shifts his weight to his other foot, runs his fingers through the hair on his nape like some sort of, some sort of _model,_ god, it’s so unfair, “I was wondering if I could get your number and --”

“And put me down as an emergency contact, right?” 

Yuri spits up his water. Dr. Nikiforov’s wide eyed, still as flushed as before, and if Yuuri sounds a little hysterical then that’s nobody’s business. “I don’t think Yuuko has me down for that.” he continues, “I should probably do that. Just in case.” 

“Oh my _god._ ” Yuri wheezes, filing through a cabinet. His lips are pressed together and twitching, almost as if _he’s_ the one about to be sick. A sound cracks through his throat and he has to stop, take in a deep breath, before he slides the form over to Yuuri’s trembling fingers. 

_Oh god, the girls got_ him _sick too! It’s me, I’m the bad juju._

“Excuse me.” Yuri chokes out and pushes back away from the counter in his swivel chair, pushing himself up and around the corner and down the hall. 

Yuuri wants to sink into the floor and cease to exist. 

Then comes what sounds like laughter, dry and heaving and gasping for breath, from down the hall, and Yuuri actually feels himself sink into his shoes. 

“Ah.” Yuuri’s skin goosebumps at Dr. Nikiforov’s soft tone, a shiver curling down his spine. “Ignore him.” 

“Is he..okay?” Yuuri asks, already knowing the answer but for some reason he likes hearing the death knell for his own funeral. “It came on really suddenly.”

“He’s just fine.” Dr. Nikiforov mouth draws down into a small line, his shoulders falling with the soft breath he exhales. “He’s… He’s being himself.” 

“Oh.” Well that’s kind at least. He’s sparing Yuuri’s feelings. 

That sound breaks into a whole new round of laughter and Yuuri skims through the fine print of the _Update Contact Information_ sheet Yuri had given him. The sooner he gets out of here, the sooner he can bury himself in his bed and never come out again. He fills out the lines he needs to and caps his pen and holds out the page. 

Dr. Nikiforov takes the page from him and looks it over. _Probably making sure I didn’t do anything else compromising,_ Yuuri can’t help but think, swallowing thickly.

Dr. Nikiforov hums approvingly and looks at him with a small smile. “It was great meeting you today, Yuuri.” 

“Yeah,” Yuuri whispers, staring at that smile then back at the low-simmering heat in those eyes. “You as well, Doctor --”

“Victor.” Dr. Nikiforov inclines his head, smile growing a little larger. “Call me Victor.” 

“O..Okay. Victor.” Yuuri tastes the way Victor’s name runs off his tongue and has to shut his eyes to stop another shiver. There’s a chorus of _oooo_ ’s to their right somewhere, followed by a smattering of giggles. His face heats with a vengeance, dark and deadly to his pride. 

“Right. Yes. It was great meeting you, too… Victor.” 

Victor’s smile lights up his whole face and, wow. Yuuri’s breath catches in his throat. Those eyes crinkle and there’s, are those laugh lines? Faint, small, but definitely there; Yuuri’s eyes trace each and every one and follow the bow of his upper lip. 

Victor clears his throat and Yuuri realizes he’s been staring like some sort of creep. “I--!” Yuuri’s throat closes. “I -- ah. Yes. Um. Goodbye, Victor.” 

Yuuri ushers his three giggling girls out the door, bright red and hot in the face, almost missing the deep sigh of relief that echoes behind him. 

He’s going to go back to his own practice, cuddle dogs and never step foot outside again. 

 

* * *

 

Yuri’s laugh pops the heart-shaped bubbles filling Victor’s head like needles popping balloons. He turns around, pouting hard at his receptionist, who is pointing at him from the other end of the hall and wheezing so hard he’s crying _._

“Vic -- Vict --” Yuri bursts into a whole new round of wheezing laughter, shaking so hard he has to hold his arms around his stomach and double over. 

“It’s not funny.” 

“It’s fucking _hilarious._ ” Yuri wheezes, cracking out a whole new laugh that sends him tumbling to the floor. “He -- he thought you were --” Yuri points a finger at him, wheezing, “he thought you were asking to update contact information!” 

It’s times like these that Victor is so, so thankful the practice is empty, because having one’s crush gently deny you is embarrassing enough but having a whole practice hear Victor’s woes was an entirely different thing altogether. He wouldn’t survive. 

“Even when he’s cruel he’s so kind.” Victor mourns, looking out the door where Yuuri had left not even five minutes before. He leans his weight against the countertop and tilts his head back, staring at the ceiling. The paper in his hand is a mark, a remnant of a moment when Yuuri had been here at all. 

“Mila, _Mila,_ ” Yuri gasps, tugging on Mila’s bright pink scrubs, “you should’ve seen his _face, god,_ it was the funniest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.”

“Tell me more.” Mila replies delightedly, making Victor groan. “Yura, tell me! What did his face look like?” 

“Like a kicked puppy,” Yuri tells her, falling into a fresh round of laughter as he goes into explicit and not-quite-untrue detail about the shattering of Victor’s heart. Mila’s laughter peals loud when Yuri gets to the part that cut Victor right down to the root. 

_“And put me down as an emergency contact, right?”_

“I’m going to die alone.” Victor bemoans, dipping his hand into the lollipop bowl. “Only loved by my darling Makkachin.” 

Yuri’s laughter suddenly cuts out mid-wheeze. “Hey!” Yuri shouts, footsteps pounding down the hall as he races back to the front, “Get your hand out of the fucking bowl, Nikiforov. They’re supposed to last us until next week!” 

“You’re not even in charge of accounting.” Victor mumbles, and sticks one in his mouth. 

 

* * *

 

It’s two weeks later when the world falls into place.

It’s their lunch hour, and the clinic is thankfully patient-free. Yuri’s refilling the treasure chest with packs of sticky hands and toy compasses and rainbow-colored pinwheels, the latter of which he blows into and watches the paper whirl. There’s a small smile on his face that Victor sees only once in a blue moon, gentle and content and rare. Victor keeps his mouth shut and decides not to say anything to ruin it. Instead, he turns back to his desk. 

A bright purple sticky note greets him when he opens his laptop. 

_‘Call vet to make appointment’_

Victor frowns. Normally Yuri makes the appointments since he’s the one who takes Makkachin and Potya to the vet, but maybe he forgot the last time. But, if he forgot, then why is Yuri’s handwriting staring at him from a sticky note? He could’ve made the appointment. 

It’s fine, of course; Victor doesn’t mind. He just has a lot of charts to catch up on and lots of paperwork to do and can’t really make the call. 

But. 

Victor pushes his swivel chair away and looks out of office again. Yuri’s dumping tiny containers of Play-Doh inside the treasure box and then shaking it to get the inside all nicely mixed. Yeah, no, Victor was an asshole but he wasn’t one all the time. 

He sighs and scoots back to his desk. He’ll just make the call and hope they pick up before the lunch hour is over. Besides, if he needs to he can always walk over. The vet’s in the same plaza as him and it wouldn’t be too time-consuming to go over there one of these days when the paperwork’s light and his charts are all caught up. 

He dials the number and sets his phone on his desk, letting the line ring. He expects to be on hold for quite some time --

“Hello,” greets a _very_ familiar voice from the other end of the line so suddenly that Victor jumps and flounders for the phone, trying to find where to turn off the speakerphone, “thank you for calling West Creek Plaza Veterinary Hospital, this is Doctor Katsuki. How can we help you today?” 

The breath Victor drags in is sharp and fast and deep. 

He’s so very gay. Oh god. He’s been thinking of that voice and the owner of that face for _weeks._ And here he is, metaphorically mere feet from him, for who knew how long. He was practically down the street and Victor never knew.  

“Hello?” Yuuri’s voice crackles through the receiver. “Can you hear me?” 

“Yes!” Victor gasps, “Yes! Yes I can hear you. Sorry, yes. Hi.” 

“Hi.” Yuuri laughs and Victor _melts_. “How can I help you?”

“I. I need to make an appointment. An appointment, that is, for my dog and my cousin’s cat. Preferably the same day.” 

“Okay. What’s the name?” 

“Victor.” Victor’s eyes blow wide. “I mean! Victor Nikiforov. As in Nilliforv -- Nikiforov. N-I-K-I-F-O-R-O-V.” 

“Nikifor...” Yuuri pauses. Victor holds his breath, heart threatening to beat through his ribs. “Doctor… Doctor Nikiforov?” 

_“Yes.”_ Victor sighs, sinking into his chair. “Hi again, Dr. Katsuki.” 

The silence at the end of the line is alarming. Victor’s heart jumps into his throat. 

Finally, Yuuri replies, “H-Hi.” He’s shy, flustered and beautiful and probably smiling; he can hear it in his voice. Victor hopes he’s smiling. He can imagine the soft pink on his nose, the red in his cheeks, the way those lips pull up and reach his eyes. He imagines it and blushes himself. “You can call me Yuuri, you know. We are on a first name basis.”

If it hasn’t already been made clear, Victor is not only Very Gay^2, but 17(3+x)(Very Gay^2)^2. Essentially: impossibly, terrifically, and _outstandingly_ gay. His face heats up even more. 

“Okay, Yuuri.” He wants to sing that name, croon it into Yuuri’s ear and watch him blush in real time, preferably with his face between Victor’s hands and their mouths so close they could touch. 

“So. Um.” Yuuri clears his throat. “The appointment is for, um. Makkachin and Potya, yes?” 

“Correct.” 

“Their usual check-up?” 

“Yes -- wait.” The world slows to a standstill until all Victor knows is Yuuri’s voice. “Usual?” 

“Mhm.” Yuuri laughs a little and shyly adds on, “I’m Makkachin’s _dog_ -ter.” 

And just like that, his brain shuts down. 

“Oh my god.” Victor whispers.

“Vi...Victor?” 

“Just. Just one second.” Victor holds his phone to his heart and breathes in deep. He holds it in for a count of one, two, three. Lets it out.

He’s, officially, in Love. 

“Yura.” Victor calls, dazed. He waits for Yuri’s barked back talk before he sidles up to the doorway and leans against it, staring at Yuri blankly. Yuri sits back on his haunches, squinting at him. 

“What is it?” 

Victor’s voice is distant, quiet, through the roaring in his ears. “Why didn’t you tell me he was the vet?” 

“Who?” 

“Yuuri. He’s the vet.” 

Yuri blinks and his eyes widen in understanding. “Oh.” is all he says before he goes back to dropping more toys into the treasure chest. Victor watches him, hysteria building in his veins the longer Yuri acts like this is nothing. He does not understand the horror he’s just instilled in Victor, nor the dripping-cold clutches of the epiphany that Victor just experienced. “Well, weren’t you going to find out anyway?” 

Yuri doesn’t understand _anything._

“The… The emotional turmoil I’ve been through,” Victor gasps, clutching his phone, “I thought he was their father and he _rejected_ me --” 

“He didn’t, he just thought you were totally flirting with him just like how you flirt with all the moms here, which you do.” 

“-- and all this time I could have been the one bringing our pets to the vet and I could have asked him out a long time ago, while I was in my _element_ \--” 

“You don’t have an element, Victor.” 

“-- but _no,_ I had to embarrass myself when I was in the exam room with him, and I had to embarrass myself when I asked for his number --” 

“Yeah that was pretty hilarious.” 

“-- and I actually played with the idea of committing a HIPAA violation to call him, or asking Mrs. Nishigori about him when she came by again!” Victor’s hysterical. He knows he’s hysterical. He’s just. 

“He just told me a _dog pun_ , Yura!” Victor cries. “A _dog_ pun! My dog pun!” 

“A match made in heaven.” 

“He’s an angel who told me a dog pun and I am so gay for him.”

He’s in love and Victor’s going to march down to the vet clinic and ask that man on a date. He’s going to ask and he’s going to flirt and he’s going to --

“Uh, Victor?”

Victor freezes. Looks at his phone. 

He’s still on the call with Yuuri. 

The whole world flips. 

_Haha._ Victor smiles. _Hahahahaha._ _Fuck._

Yuri chokes. He covers his mouth with his palm but the laughter roars from him anyway.

“Ah, Yuuri!” Victor says, laughing awkwardly, hoping he sounds normal. “Hi!” 

_“Oh my god.”_ Yuri wheezes. That tells Victor he’s failing spectacularly. Yuri doubled over and laying on the floor only cements that fact. He’s cackling loud enough that he’s sure Mila _and_ Yuuri can hear him. 

Yuuri’s giggling on the other end of the line and Victor prays that’s a good sign. He hopes it means good things. His throat is closing and his stomach is dropping and he’s going to have arrhythmic palpitations if Yuuri doesn’t say anything in the next five seconds. 

“Victor,” Yuuri the Angel, the Unattainable Gorgeous Man, says, and Victor steels himself to be kindly let down just like before, “Maybe we… maybe we can schedule Makkachin’s appointment tomorrow over coffee? I’m free at two.” 

Wait. Victor sucks in a sharp breath. 

“If you want.” Yuuri adds quickly, “Only if you want. I know you must be busy --”

“No.” Victor replies, breathless. The panic from before is subsiding into a loud and pressing nothingness, light as air but powerful like a creeping storm. Victor could float. “No. Two is… Two is perfect.” 

“Okay.” Yuuri’s smile is obvious in his voice when he answers, shy and pretty and thrilled. _Thrilled._ “I’ll come by then. See you tomorrow, Victor.”

“Yeah…” Victor whispers, “See you tomorrow, Yuuri.” 

Victor doesn’t notice when the line clicks. 

Yuri squints at him, his laughter dying down to hiccups. “Ah. Victor?” he asks when Victor hasn’t moved from his spot. “Oi, Victor. You’re creeping me out.” 

It takes several seconds for Victor to find his voice. “Make sure no one schedules any appointments between two and three tomorrow.” he tells him, breathy and dazed and smiling, slowly sliding his phone into his pocket. “I have a date.” 

**Author's Note:**

> This was heavily inspired by Justine's doctors au, which you can find on her tumblr @ forovnix (˘̩̩̩ε˘̩ƪ) be sure to check out her blog for more Quality GoodsTM like the gem that inspired this fic! This fic was written with her permission and gifted to her because she's amazing
> 
> I just had to include that conversation between Yuri and Victor at the end there, it's Top Tier Gold Status Quality and cannot be topped, ever. This is peak comedy and I can only hope I did it justice.
> 
> Thank you for reading!


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